2014. What was I doing?

To those who still follow this blog, thank you and I do apologize if the activities that have happened in this blog has been close to zero for 2014.

So what have I been up to in 2014? A lot.

Mid-year 2013, a close friend of mine asked what I used to do in the call center (which was what I was doing before I went full time painting), and he mentioned about putting up a BPO in Cebu that would help individuals who come from challenging backgrounds. Aside from thinking about it, he asked me to pray hard about it, since the company would launch either late 2013/2014.

So I did work some paintings before the end of the year (which you can view here, here, and here [hehehe]) and then came typhoon Haiyan.

We had our relatives from Tacloban stay with us in Manila so I had a lot of training with taking care of children and senior citizens. Just very thankful how God took care of them (by June 2014, I got to visit Tacloban because we had a family reunion. You can find photos that I took here).

Then my friend got in touch with me before the end of the year and asked for my work details to give them an understanding of what kind of person they would need. Then, he asked if I wanted to join since they couldn't find anyone with the same experience.

I prayed hard about it since I was very comfortable with what I was doing. So I prayed, and prayed, for direction.

I looked back at how faithful God has been and how He has made things fall into place. It was no coincidence that I would be led to my friend after how many years of not meeting when I was at my previous work, the whole experience I had i the BPO industry, even my travels to Cebu back then, and all the other experiences I had with church work, has led me to where I am now. 

The work that I am involved with now helps those who come from challenging backgrounds: labor/human trafficking victims, orphans, ultra poor, traumatic experiences, and so on. 

Isaiah 1:17 - Learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, plead the widow's cause.

Isaiah 6:8 - And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” Then I said, “Here I am! Send me.”

Hebrews 13:16 “Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.”

The whole of 2014 was definitely an experience. I arrived in Cebu with just one luggage and a backpack (and a projector for the office). Created training modules, set up the office with computers, met a lot of great people, experienced my first Sinulog, took a lot of photos as a stranger in my own country, and finally started to paint again after how long.

What I learned thru this experience is that if you must remember the things that you went through which is part of what God will lead you to. And when He leads you to a place: trust in Him, and go!

Revisiting some old characters

I do miss painting the cat, elephant, and hamster. My old sketchbooks were filled with them when I started to paint. I'm thinking of having them go through another set of adventures. Here's what I have after how many eons of not having them on canvas. Enjoy!

JC and Mari

A house warming present to my close friends JC and Mari. Such a lovely couple who are always a blessing to me. We've shared a number of adventures, which have been crazy and fun hehe. All the best and cheers to you guys!

a devotional i wrote when i got lost in sg

So in every journey we at times get lost. And here's what i wrote

Apologies!

Hello to whoever still visits my blog! It's been a long time since I actually posted an entry! (and the last I checked was last year.. August I think!)

I do apologize if I haven't updated this since, well, life happened! I got sick, which ate almost two months of production since I didn't have the strength to keep my hand steady when painting. I also went to Singapore for the Affordable Art Fair which was awesome! Also had some sad experiences with the passing of one of my heroes, Dr. Vicente Ramo Sr., my grandfather, during the end of the year. Well, a lot has happened since and I am still figuring out how to keep all of you updated and will revive this blog soon.

One thing that has been constant even with all the challenges and delays/postponed events, is that God is still the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. He has been so good to me no matter how much of a stubborn child I may be!

Here are some photos on selected events (well there are other personal events but that's personal:p and I'll post reaaally delaaaayed news in the future hehe so sorry! I've got my solo show on April! :D

Black Von Trapp
76x101 cm

This was the last painting I made the day I started to get the first blow of dengue

My siblings and i goofing around in the hospital

church friends visited!

my first burger after how many days of not eating right!

at ManilART 2012!

2011 and 2012. Well, 2011 I was a viewer, 2012 I was part of it! :D

At the F1 Pit Bldg for the Singapore AAF! Brix is with my Jaguar piece and at front we have Tito dGreat!

Having my Coffee and Kaya Toast in China Town

at the F1 Pit Bldg.

I got to share the message on a ChurchNOW event about God is Father!

Dr. Ramo Visits Mama Nena
76x101 cm

A tribute painting of my grandfather who passed away at the end of the year. :(

Untitled
101x101 cm

shifted to flowers for a time. I'm still going to dive into painting more. It's relaxing to paint flowers

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
121x121 cm

one of the latest automobile paintings I've done

 Well I'll end this here and I'll start blogging again some time and if you wish to view my updated portfolio you can go to the home page and just search it hehe! Thanks and God bless!

Liberty Street Clothing Company "White Simplicity" Shirt

Great shirts. Great purpose. Got myself a white one and I love it. I'm afraid of wearing a white shirt but this shirt got me wanting to get more of them hehe.
Check out their site

http://libertystreetclothing.com/

and I'm excited to wear it out!

les petits trésors et les grandes prières

de deux extrémités

J'ai juste écrit plus tôt sur le devotional quotidienne que j'envoie sur les trésors. J'ai écrit sur la collecte et la thésaurisation. Si nous ne recueillons pas ce qui est bon pour nous il peut endommager nous beaucoup.

J'ai mes propres collections personnelles. J'ai mes montres, j'ai mes bracelets, j'ai mes chaussures, j'ai mes chemises, mes jeans, mes livres. Les petits trésors dans la vie qui me rendent heureuse. « Couronnes » pour chaque réussite qui je crois ont besoin d'une célébration pour. Je ne suis pas vraiment dans les expériences mais plus sur des choses tangibles. Cependant, j'ai appris que dans la vie, c'est l'expérience qui comptent le plus. Je peux seulement porter une paire de chaussures à la fois. Le temps est précieux. Et je suis frustré par le fait que le temps est un luxe que je souhaite, j'ai eu. Je suis pressé partout. J'ai un délai à respecter pour les expositions d'art, j'ai un calendrier personnel à la fin de peintures et de perdre du poids. Et aussi dans une voiture, maison et femme (et qui ne signifie pas que c'est dans cet ordre). Plus important encore, j'ai appris que Dieu est en contrôle de tout. Bien que je sois anxieux vers les désirs de mon cœur, je sais que pour un fait qu'il est là pour donner lorsque je suis prêt. Dieu, veuillez me préparer avec les étapes que je vais prendre bientôt. Veuillez être avec moi si mon cœur sera brisé, ou ensemble. Je t'aime.

Thea + Trauma. I'm sorry.

Here’s Thea. You pronounce her name as spelled or in our local tongue “Tia.” She’s such a lovely dog. She’s a mix breed: Husky and a smaller breed (Chihuahua? I’m not sure). She’s very friendly with women. But with men, she hides. Here’s her story as told by my friend Jennie:

When she was a pup, she and her siblings were abused by your typical “manong” caretaker while the owners weren’t looking. When the puppies would howl (since part of them were Husky) or bark (since some were of the other smaller breed), they would spanked really hard. It’s their nature to howl. It’s their nature to bark. They don’t know any better since they were puppies. And if I’m not mistaken, some even died because of the abuse. So Thea, who got adopted (thank goodness), has always been afraid of men. Especially the ones who look like your typical “manong” carpenter or house boy.

Jennie says “it’s just like any woman. You hurt them enough, or mistreat them, they end up hiding from the hurt and sometimes we just go to our room just like Thea.” I said back “I apologize for all the guys who hurt you. And Thea.” We end up laughing and she says “good thing she’s starting to approach you, she can tell you’re not bad.” It’s a good sign I think.

Thea’s story reminds me of stories of friends who experienced trauma in different forms. A loss in the family or loved one, abuse by others, heart break, misunderstandings, and all the sort. Well, since this is public, I’d like to say I am sorry for those I may have caused some traumatic experiences to. I’m sorry if I didn’t try hard enough. I’m sorry if I became selfish. I’m sorry if it seems I just disappeared. I’m sorry for the excuses I make to justify my holding back from truly giving everything. I’m sorry for the hurt I caused. I am still learning to balance things since I  guess, I’ve been hurting too with all the insecurities I have from the traumatic experiences I went through too. But that’s just another excuse. I will one day let go of my excuses, and just give. And do what is right.

Some of the things I learned

Some of the lessons I learned as I hit my x amount of years in this life:

1. God is Love
2. I am loved, even if I don’t know it
3. Hard work pays off
4. If you want to win, you have to accept that there is risk of loss
5. I don’t want to be alone
6. There are things not only worth fighting for, but worth dying for
7. There are friends that you can run to
8. Bless others, and you will be blessed
9. There is power in prayer
10. It takes a lot to lose weight. :p
11. It’s ok to cry
12. There is always hope
13. Life is beautiful
14. I can only wear one pair of shoes at a time
15. Acrylic medium does wonders
16. Hugs and kisses and words of affirmation does wonders
17. Stay away from the negative
18. YOLO doesn't mean you can do whatever you want
19. When you’re down, talk to God. And be receptive with what He has to say
20. Waiting doesn’t mean you just sit down and do nothing
21. The universe doesn’t let things fall on your lap, but at a distance that is reachable
22. I am strong enough for the challenges I am given
23. Don’t hold back with what you need to say
24. When you say something, be sure you mean it
25. Seek counsel from Godly friends
26. Help those who need help
27. When you lay everything to God, there’s peace
28. When you need help, ask
29. Be specific and detailed with everything
30. Trust in those who trust you
31. Do your part, and when you do it, do your best, and do it for God!

Here are some shots for my day. I admit, it was a really good day even if I was avoiding  it. :)

jusqu'à ce que nous sommes prêts

Je s'écrouler à chaque fois
Contrairement à avant
Est-ce parce que
Je suis plus prudent ?
Est-ce parce que
J'ai peur de perdre ?
Est-ce parce que
Je ne veux pas vous perdre ?

Je s'écrouler à chaque fois
Vos yeux look at me
Et je masque mes sentiments
Et faire des excuses

Le silence entre
Chaque moment
Ensemble de cordes
Et j'espère que logique

Quand je suis prêt
J'espère que vous serez

Ou j'espère que vous êtes prêt
Et que vous attendent
Pour moi

Et je me servira. Et j'attendrai.

J'étais avec une autre famille le dimanche. Je ne comprenais vraiment le sentiment que j'avais. C'était surréaliste. Un outsider. Mais, je voulais être. J'ai jamais ressenti le besoin aussi forte comme avant. Je veux avoir un enfant. Je veux avoir une famille. Je veux une femme. Je veux être aimé. Maintenant n'est pas le moment, mais je sais que le temps viendra. Et ceux qui attendent et servir le Seigneur seront bénis. Et je me servira. Et j'attendrai.

je suis occupé, mais je serai fidèle

J'ai été exécuté dernièrement. C'est une bonne chose. J'ai été tenue moi-même préoccupés par les choses puisque je n'ai pas souvent la chance de sortir car les horaires ne semblent pas tomber en place. Donc ce que j'ai fait, c'est juste le travail, le travail et le travail.

J'ai une exposition d'art en vient et j'espère que cela aide ma carrière. J'ai jamais pensé que je devait avoir cette possibilité. Je suis vraiment surpris par Dieu.

Avec tout ce qui est en cours, j'ai dû mettre beaucoup de choses en attente. Que ce soit mon temps avec ma famille et mon amour de la vie. Je ne peux pas se permettre trop de choses (et Oui j'ai eu une nouvelle paire de chaussures de course, mais c' est un anniversaire avancé pour moi) contrairement à avant mais les choses commencent à tomber en place. Dieu se déplace.

Quelques dos jours, j'ai eu à discuter avec mon ami (Ron) qui mentionne que Dieu ne donne pas tous ses cadeaux immédiatement : il lui donne le bon moment. Il lui donne quand nous sommes prêts. Après deux ans d'être un artiste, il y a de nombreux défis en termes d'équilibrage des fonds et ma vie sociale. Ce mois-ci, j'aurai besoin de faire beaucoup de peintures et j'espère que me faire plus beau. Cela signifie, que je n'aurez pas trop de temps à sortir, ni avoir la possibilité de sortir. Cependant, je prends cette saison comme une leçon de Dieu : il a besoin de moi à être patient, il a besoin de moi à travailler dur, il a besoin de moi d'être fidèle à lui et faire confiance à lui et à ses plans

J'ai vraiment mal, c'est pourquoi anxieux finissent juste pour effacer de ma tête en cours d'exécution. Et pendant ces moments je lance de Mandaluyong à Ortigas quand et il existe de nombreuses conversations et les pensées que j'ai avec Dieu, et tous les conduisent à m'avoir à réparer ma carrière, donc je peux faire toutes les choses nécessaires pour être une bénédiction mieux. Si je ne travaille pas sur ma carrière maintenant, comment puis j'assurer la femme que j'aime que je serai en mesure de fournir ? Comment puis-je en toute confiance dire que notre avenir sera à l'aise ? Comment puis-je confrontés les parents en disant: « Je n'ai pas beaucoup maintenant mais j'aura plus? » Je ne suis pas dans le jeu de la relation temporelle et si la chance nous pourrait se marier l'année prochaine ! Je travaille pour un appartement qui peut accueillir une place pour la bourse, mon studio et pour une famille. C'est un grand rêve, oui, mais je suis pour y parvenir.

Je me rappelle l'histoire de Joseph et de la façon dont Dieu a été fidèle à lui et je me sens comme je suis dans la terre de Goshen. Je peux être dans la montagne mentionnée dans Aggée trop où j'ai besoin de travailler d'abord et ensuite être béni après.

Je suis vraiment excité de tout gagner et anxieux si tous mes efforts ne fonctionnent pas. Je sais que je serais toujours. Et pour ma future épouse, veuillez être patient avec moi. Je suis presque y. Je n'ai pas l'intention de vous blesser. Je veux seulement vous faire plaisir

Ce poste est tout plein de pensées au hasard, et je ne sais pas si c'est logique. Ni mon français. Hehe. De toute façon, je vais continuer à travailler dur, donc je peux assurer mon avenir et à la famille, je prie pour avoir tous les jours. Je voudrais maintenant exécuter de nouveau.

End of May

I welcomed the end of May with a close friend to commemorate what was.

Two years ago, there were some decisions that were difficult to make, with the uncertainty of how things would be, and with the looming thought of  how things could have been.

I'm not saying I miss what was, but I yearn the fullness of what was and I am hopeful to live it once more.

We all have our own end of May. Cheers to you who have pushed on and kept the faith. Cheers to you who started a new career. Cheers to you who have decided to smile for what happened.

Praise God for revealing Himself, for fixing us when we are broken, and for just being there.

Thank you Lord for the start of June :)

The busyness, sacrifices, and hopes

I’ve been busy with too many things so that I can actually get things rolling correctly. It’s funny, and not, that I have lost track of time and I had to check if it was still Thursday.  Because of all the sacrifices that I’ve made just to make both ends meet, delaying self-gratification and other pursuits, I can say, I’m struggling. I haven’t felt this way since when but I’ve never felt it run this long.

Some days I go hungry, lately I feel like I’ve been lacking so much. Some days I feel lonely. And other days, very lonely.

On a discussion with a close friend on the way home we were analyzing how amazing God’s grace and love has been upon us, even when we had to share a stick of banana q when we had nothing but enough to buy one, without the conviction of turning to God during those days. God has been very good to me even when I did not spend time for Him when I was doing very well back in my old profession.

I admit I do miss the days when I’ve had my hands filled. Money to buy the things I want without blinking an eye, to enjoy dining in different places, those little adventures which I wasn’t too fond of, the gaps of my hand filled with caring hands, sweet nothings whispered and whispered to, and all the other fun stuff. It’s when to have felt, tasted, and experienced, then taken away, is yearned. But all that is nothing. The superficial, regardless of its temporal attributes, are nothing. All that I have had was nothing, because I did not involve God.

It is a great reminder that God is always there through thick and thin. No matter if He was in the center or not. And as a father to child, this season is another season of learning. I can say now that I am, more, closer to Him because I’ve realized that I am truly nothing without Jesus. But Father, I pray that the hunger I have, be it for food, for that apartment and art studio, that car, the gadgets, not just a girlfriend but a wife, a comfortable life, a stronger relationship with You, and all that I can ask or imagine, be filled. And may whatever plans I am working on be aligned to Your will. So with everyone who may have browsed through this post.

The challenge is to lively, like that treat I had myself with some friends:)

God bless

Revisiting an old Study

I seriously didn't know what to paint today. Artist's block I suppose. I just didn't feel like anything. So I went thru some old studies that go way back 2003 and decided to just paint it. Well, it's not what I wish it to be and I my heart wasn't in my hands,  but well at least I got my hand working on something. I'll probably burn this if I'm not lazy enough to do that hehe.

Working on them GSIS entries

And I've been working on my GSIS entry for the past few days. Well, I'm not pretty comfortable with them at first but then I started to enjoy them. I still think I'll make another as a back up. We'll see if I have enough to get the materials and the sort.

7 more 20x30" canvas

Well, I'm hoarding this week to make the most of the down time to paint in peace and quiet. Will need to pass some works to the gallery next week. So excited. Here are the museum wrap canvas's that will be filled (hopefully) by the end of the week.:)

five 30x20", two 24"x24", one 36"x36"... wah

thank you neighbor for double checking!

Distraught

30x40cm
Acrylic on Canvas

What else needs to be taken away? I don't plan to wake up.

Maledictions

Quadtych 20x25/canvas

You don't need to understand everything.

Various Painting Sizes

Hello! Before I pack some paintings, here's an idea of how big they are.